February 2nd, 2012
Tip # 15
I have developed a new appreciation for the word “offer” and I am indebted to my dad. As is expected during the time of death, friends, family and acquaintances come to the house of mourning to show their respect to the family. When people visited, I would ask, “Can I offer you something to drink or to eat?” The very first time when I asked someone this question, in the presence of my father, he immediately corrected me and said “When you offer someone something, you do not ask whether or not they want it… you simply bring it out.”
Somehow, I did not pay attention to his words and found myself being corrected on two other occasions. Both times, he simply got the food and drinks and placed it on the table and said to me in a stern voice, “You do not ask your guest whether they want food and drink … you offer it by bringing it and setting it in front of your guest. That is the right way.”
Interestingly enough, each time he offered, it was always well received and it seemed that our guest happily enjoyed his heartfelt offering. For him, it is a pure offering from the heart and in that moment, he gave all that he had.
As I watched my father, I realized that this is a fundamental principle by which he lives. He offers food and drinks to others – never asks their permission. He gives himself that permission to offer and I know that many, many people have a huge respect for him for this simple gesture of generosity.
This experience had me to re-think my own value around the meaning of offering. Too many times in my own life, I have offered something, with an apprehension of holding back at the same time. It is almost as if I am not sure whether or not to offer. It is the kind of offering you make but you hope that the person doesn’t accept or you are not sure whether it is the right thing to offer. However, when I think of the many wonderful experiences I have had when I have simply offered from my heart, there was a ring of truth and honestly there which made me feel good. When I think of people who have genuinely offered me something, I can feel the love and care that has been put in it and this offering adds positive energy to my life.
Here is the body-mind connection:
To first offer someone something – we must pay attention to the other person. Here we make a mental note. For example, if you see someone struggling to buy a cup of coffee and does not have change, first of all you need to connect with an emotion that says “oh… I can help!” Then comes the physical part where you offer to pay for the coffee (not asking their permission) but simply doing it.
My morning prayer is usually an offering to God. “Dear God, I offer you myself today. Use my mind, my eyes, my hands, my feet, my heart, my ears, my mouth to do your work on this earth… let me be a vessel for You.” My offering of myself to God comes from deep within my soul and as I move through my day/life, I can see the countless times that I am not acting out of myself but I am being that vessel which I have offered to be.
As we offer to others, we feel good about ourselves. The better we feel about ourselves, the more positive energy we radiate out to others.
LookGood!!! and FeelGood!!! by offering the best we have (even to the strangers we meet along the journey.